Grocery Cart

A responsibility my siblings and I shared for our aging parents was taking my father to the grocery store. After several joint replacements, eight back surgeries and being legally blind, needless to say he did not get around too easily. Obviously, it would have been simpler to just pick up their groceries and deliver them. Being a strong persistent man, he insisted on going along, claiming he knew exactly what he wanted!

So, off we went! I pulled up to the front of the store, telling my father to sit tight while I grabbed a grocery cart. You see, he preferred to use the cart rather than a walker, which he clearly needed! As quickly as I could, running around the car grabbing a cart, oh no! - he’s opened the door and pulled himself up and out, leaning on the car. “Wait Dad, I’m coming” I call out, as I watch him hanging onto the door. I get him set with the grocery cart and say, “Wait right here while I park the car.”

But does he wait for me? Nope, out of my rear-view mirror I see him meandering in the door!

Parking the car as quickly as I could, speed walking into the store, I find my father in the produce department. Leaning against the cart, fingering apples, oranges, then bringing them right up to his eyes and nose. Thank heavens it’s b.c. (before covid). We pick out his produce then journey on through the aisle-ways. His full upper body weight leaning on the grocery cart, a bit like a bull in a china shop! Mind you, he was not a frail old man.

We did block the aisle; we were slow. Most people smiled politely, understanding my situation. Only one time did we encounter a rude man. He huffed, frowned and brazenly shoved around us. Fortunately, my father, being legally blind and very focused on shopping, did not notice this man. I just smiled a straight mouth, closed-lipped smile, you know the one, not quite friendly, but not totally rude.

What I wanted to say to this man was, “Do you see the condition he’s in? Do you think he chooses to hang over a grocery cart to balance? And do you know his wife of his youth is at home with late term Alzheimer’s in her last months of life?” Surely if he knew this, he would have been kinder. My point being everybody has a story; we must remember we don’t have insight to other’s lives. So always choose to be kind, at least muster up a straight mouth, close lipped smile. And as I write this, I realize I did not know his story, perhaps I should have given a full-mouthed smile! Be kind and don’t live old!